Stepping Back in the Ring

Prior to Christen's passing, both she and I spent considerable amounts of time at our church doing various forms of ministry. By 'various', what I mean is that, between the two of us over the last 6 1/2 years, we started, led, and/or took part in nearly every facet of the church - from children's ministry to music to sound/tech to bookkeeping to maintenance to both being on staff at different times. As of December, Christen was the backup choir director, periodically leading rehearsals, teaching songs, and directing on Sundays. I was the primary bass player, playing for 2 services on Sunday as well as the mid-week prayer meeting. Christen frequently had women over to our place to learn about being a wife and stay-at-home-mom in the 'hands-on' kind of way, truly epitomizing Titus 2. I helped count and deposit the weekly Sunday offering.

Since her passing, I have stepped back considerably in my ministry involvement. One reason for this is obvious, the other possibly less so. The obvious reason is that I have needed to figure out how to be a single parent. This process is on-going, but some things have settled in to a degree of structure, allowing for some breathing room to think about ministry again.

The less obvious reason for stepping back actually goes back to the closing point I made in her funeral sermon - NOT settling for less than God's best. With the room to think and reevaluate that I now have (though I still have a long way to go), I am able to look at everything and determine what the best next step is as it regards ministry. As I approach this, I am keeping in front of me the core elements of what the Lord has thus far revealed to me to do - preaching, teaching, and writing.

All of this is really just backstory to write about what I experienced this evening: I attended the Advance young adult ministry gathering. This was not the first time I had been there; the first time was two weeks ago when I had the opportunity to speak to them. Tonight, I was able to simply attend. It was great. They are a relatively small group of people - say, maybe 30-40 men and women - but they love God and each other. They do consistent service for the homeless. And they encourage each other to grow in their faith and serve in the church. The word that kept coming to me as I sat in the meeting was humility. They are a people marked by humility. A simple gathering. Simple service. Simple fellowship. Nothing flashy or over-the-top. No multi-colored lights, just candles. No microphones, just speaking and praying. There's nothing wrong with lights or mics, but this was refreshing in its simplicity and humility. Just people coming together to learn and grow together. What does all this have to do with my service in ministry? I don't know yet, but I loved what I experienced tonight.